A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Are You Ready to Accept Rush Limbaugh As Your Savior?

AND it came to pass in the opening days of the Obama presidency that a great dearth of satirical inspiration spread through out the land.

Editorial cartoonists were forlorn, and liberal bloggers wailed in their melancholy, for it was true that George W. Bush and his cronies had exited the national stage. Then a great wind came down from the north, spreading noxious gases about partisanship and a desire to see the new president fail.

The wind was greeted with consternation by some, but lo, the multitudes rejoiced and chanted “Rush, Rush, Rush” as the storm approached.

And it was true that Limbaugh appeared before them, and the chanting was so great that their leaders feared that the graven images of Lincoln and Reagan would topple and be ground into dust.

Their newly elected leader, one by the name of Michael Steele, even told his people that this man was an entertainer and he doesn’t speak for the party. But the other party leaders rebuked him, and put him in his place, for they saw a new breath of inspiration in the Limbaugh.

Limbaugh basked in the glow of the adulation, for he knew that, as a member of a free society, he could rightfully say whatever he wanted to say about the new president, and that he would not be physically harmed. He would not be stood up against a wall so that some could fling rocks or bullets at him. He would not be banished to a distant shore to live out his miserable existence among strangers. No, America is a free country, and Limbaugh smiled, knowing he was safe here with his followers.

Cries of bipartisanship were heard as the wind howled. The voices came from enemies, friends and allies, but the chanting drowned them out. There would be no solution to the country’s problems debated today, for bipartisanship is contrary to conflict, which begat fear, which begat many financial contributions to the party’s coffers. And the party leaders watched as the multitudes hoisted the Limbaugh onto their shoulders in praise, and carried him back into the wilderness from whence they came; and they saw that it was good.

And the editorial cartoonists, and the late night talk show comedians and the liberal bloggers also saw that it was good. For they all saw unlimited inspiration and prosperity as long as the Limbaugh wind blew.

And they all rejoiced, “Thank you God, for Rush Limbaugh, so that we may skewer his windbag full of hot air. Amen!"


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