A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Noises from the Right

There’s so much noise coming from the conservative right this week that it cannot be ignored. The noise is confounding and perplexing. Even more disturbing is the fact that I find myself agreeing with some of it. Perhaps I’m crying out for an intervention, but you be the judge.

Consider this: Former politician, right media personality, blog sex kitten, and all around pain-in-the-ass to liberals Sarah Palin has announced that she is considering a run for a Senate seat from Alaska.

Really, Sarah? Another elected office? The last one did not work out well for you: remember, you left your constituents in the lurch when you abandoned them in midstream. I hope she understands that if she is elected to the Senate that it is a FULL time position, and that she will be expected to serve the FULL six years of her term. That is if the people of Alaska are willing to take her back.

That’s right, Sarah, SIX years! Not three, but six!

Consideration #2: Republican Congressional leaders launch new argument against Obamacare in the wake of an announced one year postponement of the large employer coverage mandate.

The Republican leadership has tried 37 or so times to repeal Obamacare in full. In another example of trying to have it every way they can get it, Boehner, McConnell, Cantor, et al are now arguing that President Obama is on the side of big business on this issue. If this is true, then it is big news.

A Democratic president cozying up to Big Business? Really? There must be something in the Democratic National Platform against this sort of thing. This will also be news to Wall Street, on which the administration has tried to impose heavier regulations since Obama was first sworn in. 

Republicans now argue that Obamacare is not really looking out for the common folk. This from the people who took full campaign finance advantage of the Supreme Court ruling that big corporations are people too! Again, they are trying to have it both ways, once again forsaking the path down the middle of the road.  

Maybe the Obama administration eased the fears of Big Business with its decision to delay the mandate, but people need to be convinced that the Affordable Care Act will benefit them too. The only way they will agree to this argument is to see the legislation put into action. The Obama administration risks losing their argument if they keep delaying implementation.

Consideration #3: radio commentator/court jester for the right Rush Limbaugh actually told one of his annoyed/annoying listeners to stop watching Fox News. The radio host advised the listener that “they’re designed to get you ticked off. They’re designed to make you question your sanity.”

Well, Rush should know, since he should be considered a broadcasting pioneer in annoying vast swaths of the media public and ticking people off. Although Limbaugh later stated that his comments were only meant for certain segments of Fox News, I find myself agreeing with his comments.

You read those words correctly: I find myself agreeing with Rush Limbaugh’s comments about Fox News.

I don’t know if this revelation is a cry for help or what. Does this qualify me for an intervention? I don’t know, and more to the point, what would this intervention be like?
Would I be forced to wait on homeless at a soup kitchen until my heart started bleeding again? Would I be chained to the largest tree in southeast Pennsylvania so it would not be torn up to make way for a Walmart? Or would my lovely wife AM chain me to my chair, prop my eyelids open while she plays the mini-series Franklin and Eleanor repeatedly on our VCR until I cry, “New Deal is good!  New Deal is good!”

Limbaugh’s comments could also be taken to mean that he has seen the light and is making the slow walk into the dark side of American politics, aka bleeding heart liberalism. I’m kidding of course! There is no way Limbaugh would ever adopt a liberal line of thinking. I’m also kidding about liberalism being dark. It’s actually bright and sunny over here!

Come on over, everyone! The warmth of social justice and equality is fine! And cultural tolerance? We have it wall-to-wall!

Um, everyone can come over except Rush. His girth would block out the sunshine of social progress.

(Thank you for reading! Also, Sarah, if you were elected Senator you’d have to live in Washington!  Ewwwwwwwwwwww!!!!!!!)


Blogger Bob said...

The MGB™, AKA Mama grizzly Bore, won't run. She's just trying to remain relevantly irrelevant.

July 11, 2013 at 8:04 AM  
Anonymous Janey said...

May I chain Sarah to a tree?

July 11, 2013 at 8:40 AM  
Blogger todd gunther said...

Hi Bob! Thanks for the comment. Yes, that would make sense for her.

Dear Janey, of course you can chain her to a tree...but only if I can watch!

July 12, 2013 at 6:59 PM  
Anonymous Janey said...

Once I have her securely chained to the tree, she's all yours...! :-)

July 13, 2013 at 8:14 AM  
Blogger Harpers Keeper said...

Hate to say it but I think Sarah will not only run but win. Her handlers see the writing on the wall. IF she hopes to have any continued presence in the media (read "speaking fees") she needs to do something to get back into the public eye before she follows George W into anonymity.

July 15, 2013 at 11:25 PM  

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