Head Stone Tributes
I’m thinking
ahead again to the inevitable; sorry, can’t help it. I’ve been mulling over ideas for my head
stone. What follows is my current list
of finalists. No doubt I’ll get more
ideas in the future which I will post here. After all, I don’t expect to have to use any of these for years to come.
Here are some inscriptions I’ve considered - and rejected most of these for being too wordy - for my head stone.
Here are some inscriptions I’ve considered - and rejected most of these for being too wordy - for my head stone.
1. I don’t see any ketchup here. What kind of hell am I in?
2. Come on in! The dirt is fine!
3. I’m spending eternity with the souls
of every shrimp I’ve consumed at a Chinese buffet…and man, do they look pissed!
4. Okay, God, you can stop laughing now!
5. If you’re reading this and eating
peel ‘n’ eat shrimp without me, then I must be dead.
6. You’re wrong! I’m not pining for the fjords.
7. If you’re reading this and enjoying
kettle chips with California onion dip without me, then I am definitely dead.
8. No, no, no! This can’t be heaven! Afternoon Delight is being played on an
eternal loop! No, no, no!
9. If you always look down, you’ll never
see the sun shine.
(Thank you
for reading. And I’m not resting after a prolonged squawk!)
posted by todd gunther | 7:08 PM
10 Comments:
I've left instructions for the inscription on my stone "To sleep: perchance to dream" because of my career and love of sleep disorders. Of course Shakespeare was referring to "death" when he said "sleep" in Hamlet's "To be, or not to be" soliloquy.
You may well be aware of the epitaph which was 'voted' this country's favourite - Irish comedian Spike Milligan, "I told you I was ill."
(Well, at least if you didn't know it it might have been worth it!)
If you ever again write negatively about the beautiful 1970s' sex song Afternoon Delight, then your demise may sooner than you wish...
Hi David, your inscription is lovely! I didn't appreciate Shakespeare in high school, but I've grown (matured?) to accept all the accolades given to his work over the years.
Thank you Raybeard for reminding me of Spike Milligan's epitaph. I've always considered "The Goon Show" the epitome of radio comedy; although I got more out of the later "I'm Sorry I'll Read That Again."
Ah, Janey! We live in a truly diverse world where some of us believe "Afternoon Delight" is the word of God, and those of us who believe it's aural shit. :)
BTW, how's your mom? Please give our best wishes!
TG, I never really 'got' the goons, even though I'm old enough to rememeber them being broadcast for the first time. I laughed only because one was expected to, though I do find the surreal bits a bit funnier now, but not as side-splitting as some do.
Yes, 'I'm Sorry...Again" was, and still sounds, brilliant. I especially liked the inter-reaction with the very knowing studio audience. The programmes do get re-broadcast from time to time on one of the BBC channels - 'Radio 4 Extra' - but at this present time they, sadly, are off. Great stuff!
"Finally stopped worrying"
If you always look down, you'll never see the sunshine. I love that.
Now about planting that earworm afternoon delight in my head.......
Hi Raybeard. I could enjoy the Goons when our local NPR station ran them, despite the thick accents they would use for their various characters and the staticky radio reception.
I think I have over 20 cassette tapes of ISIRTA in my archives. Someday we will have to embark on our own quest for the green eye of the little yellow dog.
Very nice sentiment, Spo! Short and sweet!
Thank you Fearsome Beard; that one is actually my favorite and I might use it if I ever actually have a head stone.
Sorry about the earworm. I advise ten straight hours of Led Zeppelin to extricate this worm.
"Ah, Lady Constance. How long is it now?" "Mmmm - Let me see. Thank you!"
(You probably know that the Lady Constance character was based on Dame Edith Evans who, the story goes, was played a recording of it and she didn't realise it was herself being lampooned.)
Hi Raybeard, and thanks for the flashback. Actually, no, I did not know that Lady Constance was based on anyone in particular. I believe that she and Warrior Queen share the same attitudes towards life in general.
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