A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Location: Southeastern, Pennsylvania, United States

Monday, May 03, 2010

Whacha Smokin’, Arizona?

The good citizens of the state of Arizona have had enough! They’ve had enough of illegal immigrants crossing their borders and causing — according to them — all sorts of mayhem. Illicit drug trade, kidnappings, and murder have been on the rise, as if these things never happened before people noticed that there were more and more Hispanics in their midst. Apparently it’s gotten so bad that Governor Jan Brewer signed legislation empowering local law officials to stop anyone they suspect may be an illegal immigrant, and demand that they produce papers to prove their US citizenship.

Somewhere Adolf Hitler is crying tears of joy!

The new law has been criticized by everyone from the President on down to civil rights leaders. Even Republican Congressional leaders have weighed in against this law passed by one of their own governors. Brewer has defended her action with the argument that she had to do it because the federal government refused to reform immigration.

This whole controversy begs a few questions. Questions like, what are you people smoking down in the Grand Canyon State? The peyote must be reeeal goooood this year! Another question I have is, “Isn’t this enough proof that we should give the state back to the Navajo nation?" The thought is tempting...

A boycott of all products and services produced in Arizona has been proposed. Okay, let’s think this through. People could stop buying products manufactured there, but more than likely a boycott will impact the tourist and hospitality industry. Conventions will move their meetings elsewhere and cancel their accommodations. Ditto for families who will opt out of a trip to the Grand Canyon. So who will be punished the most?

I’d be willing to bet that many workers in the hospitality industry are the very same illegal immigrants that the state of Arizona will begin to stop for proof of citizenship. Hotel housekeepers and restaurant wait staff will see business fall off sharply. Their managers will be forced to lay them off and, with no other job prospects around, these workers may suddenly see Mexico — even with its seemingly endless drug cartel wars - as the land of opportunity. Ironically, a business boycott may in fact accomplish what the Arizona legislature hopes to do: reduce the number of illegal immigrants in their state.

When Brewer accuses the federal government of doing nothing, someone should remind the governor that it was her own party that couldn’t agree on immigration reform at the national level during the Bush administration. Now everyone is renewing their calls for Washington to try again. For arguments sake, let’s just pretend that the Obama administration is able to get a bi-partisan agreement on reform through Congress and signed into law.

The good news is the anti-immigration protesters will go home. The bad news is they’ll be replaced just as quickly by the tea partiers who might see the reforms as another big government intrusion on citizen’s lives. The Obama administration will find itself in a no-win situation.

Perhaps some protesters won’t go home after all. They could just stay in place and wait for their fellow tea partiers to show up. The protest slogan, “We want our country back,” could become the all-purpose mantra for a variety of issues. The law is already being challenged by a few lawsuits, and that might be what eventually kills a law that is so ripe for abuse. Face it: a few unscrupulous members of the law enforcement community could see the law as a legal way to act on their own prejudices or even fulfill their sexual appetites. The victims will cry (rightly) that their civil rights have been violated. Perhaps the entire state will go bankrupt under the weight of all the legal actions that this law will undoubtedly bring.

On second thought, maybe the Navajos won’t want the state back after all.

(Thank you for reading. Please remember to have your papers in order when entering Maricopa County...or any other county in Arizona, for that matter!)


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