A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Location: Southeastern, Pennsylvania, United States

Sunday, February 18, 2007

The President Who Cried Wolf (Again)

Oh, W! Whatever will we do with you? First you sold us this idea of a war because the other side was a threat to us with their WMDs. Then you predicted that we would be greeted as liberators in Iraq. Next, you rewarded those people in your administration that failed miserably to get the desired results.

Now you’re crying out that Iran is supplying one of the insurgent factions in Iraq with weapons that are being used against us. The ironic part about all this is that, for the first time in your administration, you may be right on this issue. Your history haunts you; no weapons of mass destruction were found, our forces have been greeted with roadside bombs instead of outstretched arms, and your loyal friends have moved on and away from this mess in Iraq.

What part of no credibility don’t you understand? Oh, I know, you’ll respond that you understand that people won’t believe whatever you say because you say things that they find hard to believe. Did you like that last sentence? That is a classic W. statement. Do your speechwriters actually put sentences like that in your statements, or do you ad-lib them?

Anyway, what I’m trying to say is it’s not your message that is hard to swallow this time. It’s you, you are the problem. Oh, perhaps if you had admitted you made some errors a long time ago, people might have more faith in what you’re telling them now. You couldn’t do that, heavens no, that might go against the Bush family credo or something like that.

Perhaps you need to find someone that people will find more likely to believe. Maybe someone like Yoko Ono. Yes, you’ve fallen so far, that even Yoko is more believable than you are. Maybe Hillary Clinton...oh, right, she’s from the other party and she even voted for your war. How about Barack Obama? He’s well spoken, no skeletons in his closest that your side hasn’t found yet and...oh, wait. He’s been against your war since the beginning.

Sorry, W. It looks like you’re on your own again. I know that your administration will engage the enemy (American public opinion) in an all-out assault on the most dangerous fronts, namely the Sunday morning political talk shows. There, you’ll do battle with the liberal media, and you’ll know that your cause is just and fair, because you are the President! It’s a pity that your people can plan and execute a battle on America’s airwaves, but you can’t fight a war to save your life, or any other of the 3100 American lives lost so far.

Now I did hear you say that your plan for Iraq is taking shape. This statement implies to me that you never had a plan when you invaded Iraq in the first place. This is something that the rest of the world figured out oh, about three years ago. If you really believe this statement, then maybe you’re finally seeing the error of your ways. Maybe there’s hope for you yet, W.

(Speaking of Yoko Ono, Happy 73rd Birthday!)


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