Monday Rants

Monday, the mortal enemy of all that is just and good, or so my editor would have me believe, is here again. The stress of returning to the work week can be overwhelming. So what better time than to relieve some of the stress with a rant or two about subjects that are near, but certainly not dear, to our hearts. Subjects like…

BEER COMMERCIALS ON TELEVISION

I had an epiphany recently about beer commercials. I’ve always realized that there is a big divide between the ideal environment depicted in commercials and the starkness of real life. Yet I realized that the divide is severe when it comes to alcohol ads.

The idealness hits a ludicrous high in scenes set in a bar where all of the clientele are fit, robust, or otherwise sexy. The ad asks us to believe that these people are typical beer drinkers who slam back a brewski or two when they are out with friends. In reality, anyone who chugs a beer or two on a regular basis is anything but fit and trim.

RANT: WHERE IN HELL ARE THE BEER GUTS? WHERE ARE THE REAL WORKING CLASS SLOBS WITH THE STOMACHS LAPPING OVER THE BELT LINES AND HIGH CHOLESTEROL?

VIOLENCE IN AMERICA

NRA chief Wayne LaPierre has pointed his trigger fingers at anything but the enormous arsenal of guns in our society for the problem of gun violence. He cited two problem areas that are clearly beyond his area of expertise: mental illness in America, and the marketing of violent video games to America’s young people. 

In his cynical move to protect his high-paying lobbying position (cloaked behind his argument to preserve the Second Amendment), LaPierre believes that the government can create laws that will alleviate these issues without harming the rights of law-abiding gun owners.

Did I say his argument was cynical? I also meant to say that his viewpoint is naïve.

If state legislators across the country are favoring slashing budgets on domestic programs (some of which aid the mentally ill) is any indication, then mental illness will continue to be a societal problem for years to come. No federal laws can overcome the perception that there is no money to be spent on such social safety nets. As for video games, no laws can criminalize their content without running afoul of free speech. Besides, the mantra that “when guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns” can be easily applied to other perceived enemies of the people, such as violent video games. A market based backlash on the entertainment industry would be more effective than any law Congress could pass. In other words…

RANT: IF YOU BELIEVE JUNIOR IS TOO WEAK MINDED TO NOT BE INFLUENCED BY VIOLENT VIDEO GAMES, THEN DON’T BUY THE GODDAMN THINGS! DUH! LOST PROFITS WILL SEND A DECISIVE MESSAGE TO VIDEO GAME PRODUCERS AND THEY WILL BE FORCED TO MARKET OTHER PRODUCTS TO AMERICA’S YOUTH.

PUBLIC ADMISSION OF IDEAS THAT MOST PEOPLE ALREADY TOOK FOR GRANTED

This is not so much a rant as a kudos to long-time respected leader Colin Powell. On this week’s edition of Meet The Press, he called out many members of his party (Republican) for being, um, you know, hateful-like in a way that has been determined to be discriminatory to certain groups of people…oh, all right, I’ll stop dancing around the elephant in the room! He called them racist! 

He actually said that many people in his party base their feelings about Obama not on his leadership skills, not on his competency as President, but their disdain for him is based on the color of his skin. WOW! GO FIGURE!

Many of us had already figured that out — or at the very least believed that was the cause to dislike Obama — a long time ago. Granted, we must assume that there are prejudiced people in the Democratic Party too, but Mr. Powell never mentioned the other side.

SO KUDOS TO COLIN POWELL FOR SPEAKING HIS MIND, AND HAVING THE COURAGE TO CALL A SPADE, UM, YOU KNOW, A SPADE!

(Thank you for reading. As the late Sam Kinison was often heard to say: “AGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!)"