A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Tuesday, August 01, 2017

My Favorite Republicans

The scene: a therapy session for Liberals at the FDR Clinic for Social Progress (Jimmy Carter Wing):

Me:  Hi, my name is Todd…

Group: Hi, Todd…

Me: And, um, okay I’m a liberal Democrat who likes a few Republican conservatives…

Group: Gasp!

Group Moderator: Calm down, everyone.

Me:  No, wait hear me out.  I do like a few of them. Trust me, it’s a very short list and its membership is fluid.   I mean the people on my list drop off and added back on at anytime depending on their actions on that particular day.  Anyway, if you will indulge me for a moment or two, I would like to confess that, yes, there are a few conservatives I admire.

Group: (General grumbling).

Me:  Anyway, one Republican who is not on the list is Abraham Lincoln.  He’s not there because hey, who doesn’t like Lincoln?  I daresay that given the Republican Party’s position on slavery then (FYI, at that time they were against it) that I would have been a Republican too!  Although that assumes that living in the 19th century I would possess the same 20th century sensibilities, but I probably shouldn’t assume that.

Another Republican I like is Bob Dole.  Remember him?  Most of my admiration for him comes from the way he rose through the ranks of society to become a Senator.  I see him as the typical Horatio Alger hero who started in a company’s mailroom and worked hard to gain a position of power.  Only in Dole’s case his company was the United States and the mailroom the Armed Forces.  He was severely wounded in serving his country and, after recovering, continued his career in public service.

Yes, true he did tow the party line more times than I would’ve liked.  Despite his years of service I did not feel compelled to vote for him when he ran against Bill Clinton in 1996.   He was backed by too many of those right wing extremist evangelicals back then for my political taste.  Still, I admire how he rose through the ranks of “the company” to serve his country.

Now that brings me to the latest liberal hero, John McCain.  Yes, I have disagreed with him in the past and even questioned if he was senile during his run against Obama in 2008.  Let’s admit it!  We all thought he was suffering from dementia when he choose that loopy broad from the Great White North as his running mate, if I may be allowed a brief moment of Frank Sinatra like misogyny.

Recently though he has taken hell from the liberal end of social media for voting to allow the Senate’s version of the repeal and replace the ACA to come to the Senate floor for debate.  I thought this was good because at least the Democrats might have a fighting chance to introduce amendments to this bill that would throw millions of Americans off their health insurance. 

Then the President and his Republican colleagues counted on him to vote with the bill.  Wrong!  The Maverick struck again!  He voted for country over party lines.  His vote defeated the repeal effort…for now.

Keep in mind that he returned from his home state where he was being treated for brain cancer.  Imagine interrupting his treatment to cast the deciding vote on a bill that directly affects one-fifth of the American economy!  That took courage!  And this is years after his service in Vietnam where he was taken prisoner and endured years of abuse at the hands of the Vietcong.  How many of us would do that for our country!

Group Moderator:  That’s all very commendable, Todd, but we can’t help noticing a crack in your full loyalty to liberal causes.

Me:  We have to reach across the aisle sometime!  That’s what democracy is all about!

Group:  Rehabilitate him!  Re-educate him!

Me:  No, wait.  I still have serious liberal cred!

Group Moderator:  Hmm…we might have room for you in the Bernie Sanders ward.

Me: I never liked Nixon!

Group (in unison):  Re-educate!  Re-educate!

Me:   Ummm…Barry Goldwater was a jerk!

Group Moderator:  Yes, let’s put you in the Sanders room for awhile.

Me:  Let’s hear it for Alger Hiss!

Group Moderator:  Security!

(Thank you for reading.  A now a nice time out...)


Blogger Bob Slatten said...

There are some good Republicans, it's just that they are so few and far between.

August 1, 2017 at 7:31 AM  
Blogger mistress maddie said...

I now see why Anne Marie is smitten with you...your a hoot. I think the same as you. We need good people on both sides to get things done and keep a balance. Like Bob said, there few and far between, but we have to cultivate more like them.

Fun post!

August 1, 2017 at 12:50 PM  
Blogger todd gunther said...

Thank you, Bob. I know there are some good ones out there somewhere.

Thank you, Maddie. It's been ages since I went before a group therapy session in my blog. I need to get back to those entries.

August 2, 2017 at 6:31 AM  
Blogger Ur-spo said...


August 5, 2017 at 6:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just stumbled across your blog. I have read some of your most recent entries. I think you are a great writer. I really enjoyed the group therapy session. It is hard to believe that Abraham Lincoln is the party of Donald tRUMP.

August 13, 2017 at 8:47 AM  
Blogger todd gunther said...

Thank you, Spo.

Thank you mcpersonal. Yes, it is hard to believe that this is the party of Lincoln.

August 14, 2017 at 6:50 AM  

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