arteejee

A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Location: Southeastern, Pennsylvania, United States

Sunday, November 08, 2020

Sunday Morning Post (V.2, #44) - Ahhhhhhhh!

I first heard the wonderful news once I punched out from my job at noon.  I immediately went to my AOL account to see if our vote count in Pennsylvania had been updated. Praise be!  Not only had someone called Pennsylvania into Joe Biden’s column, but the state of Nevada was added as icing on the cake.

See, Warrior Queen, there is a God.

So, one drama concludes and another will soon unfold. The current tenant in the White House is vowing to fight the most recent results of American democracy in action.  He has already sent his lawyers to the swing states to sniff out/find/conjure out of thin air examples of voter malfeasance.  They hope that any examples of wide spread voter fraud they find will allow the whole election to be overturned in favor of their client. 

Good luck, lawyers!  Don’t kill yourselves in this assignment.  You won’t see a cent of your billable hours since your client has a very long reputation of being a cheat and cheapskate.

My advice: hang out in the hotel bar for a few days and charge everything to the current President.

The current President keeps spreading horrible rumors that the Democrats have stolen the election through fraudulent ballots.   Really, Mr. President?  The Democrats stole an election by committing fraud in only 5 swing states. It seems to me that if the Democrats wanted to commit fraud, then we would see 45 states going for Biden, all 100 seats in the Senate and all seats in the house would have had Democrats sitting in them. 

If all of that had happened then yes, even I would be suspicious that voting fraud happened.  Democrats got the White House, but disappointingly, little else.  The gains were qualitativly significant, but quantifiably small.  If Democrats wanted to cheat, they should have thought bigger.   Go big or go home, as the Mistress would say.

To that end this whole President denying the outcome reminds me a bit of the Black Knight from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.  (Editor’s Note: in today’s performance the part of Joe Biden is being played by Graham Chapman.)

This is a great moment for a native Pennsylvanian like myself.  Biden is only the second American from Pennsylvania to ever be elected President.  The first was James Buchanan.  Never heard of him?  It’s just as well.  There are a number of good reasons why people don’t remember him.  Until #45 was elected, Buchanan had the reputation among many historians of being the worst President in our history.

I sincerely hope Biden will make us Pennsylvanians so proud that we forget Buchanan and ole what’s his name.

(Thank you for reading.  And now the real work begins...)

7 Comments:

Blogger Raybeard said...

Will that 'Very Stable Genius' now accept the fact, at long last, that he's a loser, LOSER, LOOZER, LOOOOOO-ZZZZAHHHHHHH!!!!

I'm ever so happy for y'all, RTG.

November 8, 2020 at 11:47 AM  
Blogger Debra She Who Seeks said...

James Buchanan may have been an ineffectual president who was unable to prevent the civil war (and was reputedly a *gasp* homosexual), but his name lives on in popular culture as the namesake of James Buchanan "Bucky" Barnes, the Winter Soldier. Captain America's boyfriend, of course. LOL!

November 8, 2020 at 11:53 AM  
Blogger Mistress Maddie said...

Oh sweet cheeks A happy day. Listen to the sound of relief from a Biden win.

Holy Mary Mother of God, Hallelujah and amen!

And hows about them speeches last night. We even got adults too Todd!!!!!!!

November 8, 2020 at 12:40 PM  
Blogger Bob said...

I find it odd that someone is sending out his Flying Monkeys to scream fraud is off playing golf.
Doesn't seem like he cares so much.

November 8, 2020 at 1:13 PM  
Blogger Ur-spo said...

What a Brilliant simile !!!
That was the best comment about the rotten orange yet !

November 8, 2020 at 1:38 PM  
Blogger anne marie in philly said...

sorry, ain't no god. just karma and fate.

November 8, 2020 at 2:40 PM  
Blogger todd gunther said...

Thank you Raybeard. I'm also happy, but I don't think the idea has sunk in yet.

Hi Debra. I didn't know our Mr. Buchanan had other references in pop culture.

The speeches were wonderful, Maddie.

Flying Monkess indeed, Bob.

Thank you, Spo.

A victory is a victory, eh Warrior Queen. We'll take it no matter the source.

November 8, 2020 at 8:45 PM  

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