A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

My Photo
Location: Southeastern, Pennsylvania, United States

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Impressions of the Inauguration

First of all, congratulations are in order for all of us who survived the trauma inflicted by the so-called leadership in Washington during the last eight years. I should also express gratitude to the rest of the world for your patience with the American people who "elected" this leadership, not once, but twice. We hope our most recent choice is a step in a right direction, and we are very hopeful that Barack Obama will do everything he can to rectify some of the errors made by the last administration.

The Obama Administration is just a few days old and we are still basking in the afterglow of Inauguration Day. I must admit to having a warm feeling rise in my chest when I heard the Chief Justice congratulate Obama upon completing the oath of office. I know what you’re thinking, but no, it definitely wasn’t any sort of leakage from my heart surgery scar. I don’t know if my reaction was a swell of pride, or a happy realization that this would be a great moment in our country’s history, or a mixture of both. In either case, I consider myself lucky that I am alive to witness this moment.

Of course, despite all of the careful planning for the festivities, we had to expect a few goofs along the way. The first notable mistake was the Oath of Office ceremony itself. Chief Justice Roberts got the words mixed up, and both he and President Obama stumbled for a few seconds.

Poor guy was understandably nervous, given that this was the first time he gave the oath to a new president. Perhaps he got so used to former President Bush mangling words around that he didn’t think anyone would notice if a few places were out of words. (In case you’re wondering about my own syntax skills, I wrote that last sentence with a deliberate mistake, just so the Chief Justice doesn’t feel so bad.) The whole incident demonstrates that there is a lack of good, experienced help in Washington these days.

Still, there is a happy ending to this story. President Obama retook the oath of office the next day in the spirit of “abundant over cautiousness” according to the White House. Unfortunately, the Lincoln Bible — which was used during the first ceremony — was not available for the second ceremony.

I’ve heard a rumor that the reason the Lincoln Bible was not available was because it had already been returned to the library. My sources tell me that the Bible was outrageously overdue, since the date of April 15, 1865, was stamped on the card in the back of the book. Apparently, Mr. and Mrs. Lincoln intended to drop it off on the way home from the theatre the night before, but, well...things happened.

The former administration was allowed to leave without incident, although curiously former Vice President Dick Cheney was wheelchair bound. The official reason was that he injured his back while moving boxes to his new home. I believe he just wanted to show everyone his impression of Lionel Barrymore from “It’s A Wonderful Life”. That joker! He’s still trying to top his other gags which include “How many WMD’s are there in Iraq?” and “Shooting lawyers for fun...and fun”.

Obama was very cordial to the parting administration, even though many of us were hoping that Bush, et al, would be greeted with US Marshalls and arrest warrants as they boarded the helicopter. No such luck! This was disappointing, but, after all, there will be plenty of time for bitter partisan recriminations and subpoenas later. For now, all of us should prepare to roll up our sleeves and help President Obama do the hard tasks that lie ahead.


Post a Comment

<< Home