A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Location: Southeastern, Pennsylvania, United States

Saturday, January 31, 2015

The Return of Snort Bites (January 2015)


Well, he’s credited with inventing the television mainstay, but who can argue with his longevity? A contemporary of Ed Sullivan, his show began televising in 1950. For the next 43 years, he held court interviewing established entertainers, up and coming acts, and acts seeking to launch their comeback. The latter inspired a scene in Woody Allen’s Broadway Danny Rose. Then, in the 22 years since his television show ended, he continued broadcasting a show on Bloomberg Radio.

Insomniacs in the New York metro area (or, in my case, the cable system in Bloomsburg PA) could always count on Franklin to entertain them at the obscenely early hour of 1:00a. Other times his show would be broadcast at 9:30a. The sound of his theme (12th StreetRag) and a fast paced image procession of past show business icons (among them Laurel and Hardy; I don’t know if they were ever interviewed by Franklin) heralded another installment of The Joe Franklin Show. Click on the SFW linky!

The episodes were always entertaining even on an occasional slow night when he would bring out the show’s photo album, and reminisce about past show guests who “are no longer with us”.  Then there was the bizarre interview with “Weird Al” Yankovic when he recreated his favorite snack. For the record, it is a slice of pepperoni pizza topped with whipped cream and a jelly bean garnish. (He had me until he got to the jelly beans!) We should probably consider this normal for an entertainer who incorporates the word weird into his name, but otherwise it was a classic Joe Franklin moment.

Rest in Peace, Mr. Franklin.


Okay, this headline is not news to the liberal media, but her rambling speech at an Iowa gathering of Republican 2016 hopefuls left her fans troubled and Democrats rejoicing. In that spirit, I want to thank my fellow American voters for their courageous insight in 2008 when they did not vote for her ticket. Thank you, America.

Meanwhile, back in Iowa, Palin lambasted big government (at least I think that was the gist of her speech) and the status quo; her colorful definition of the government riding the backs of the common man raised the specter of political activist pioneer Saul Allinsky (even I had to Google Saul Allinsky); and she pointed three fingers of j’accuse at the liberals. The most incredible part:   Palin got a standing ovation for this bizarre attempt at persuasion.

Oh, Iowa! I feel so bad for you now.

Palin’s performance was later blamed on a malfunctioning teleprompter. If that is true, then let me pause to express my gratitude for this latest failure in modern technology. Thank you, malfunctioning teleprompter!

I believe Forrest Gump said it best, “Stupid is as stupid does.”

(Thank you for reading. Seriously, Iowa, I know you feed the nation and all that, but what is your deal?)


Blogger Ur-spo said...

Mrs Palin could not ad lib a coherent speech? Doesn't bode well for the dimwit.

January 31, 2015 at 9:26 PM  
Blogger todd gunther said...

Thank you, Spo! Sad, but true, It makes you wonder how she would handle the 3:00 AM call to the White House scenario without a teleprompter, working or otherwise.

February 1, 2015 at 9:21 AM  
Blogger John Going Gently said...

Mz palin impressed the whole UK with her stupidity a year or so ago..we thought we'd never have a dumb ass like her in political power
Then what happened
The UKIP part surfaced

February 2, 2015 at 12:22 PM  
Blogger Harpers Keeper said...

I loved that part when she went all 60's metaphorical on us about bending your back for "The Man". Perhaps she'd trying to establish her street cred. Who knew she was philosophical heir of Angela Davis?

February 3, 2015 at 12:00 PM  
Blogger todd gunther said...

Thanks for writing, John Gray. Sadly it appears the right wing loonies are rising up every where.

Thank you Harper's Keeper. Street cred for Palin? Isn't that up to us to bestow on her?

February 9, 2015 at 6:51 AM  

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