Suggestions for the Second Hundred Days

Now that Barack Obama’s first 100 days in office have passed, many will be analyzing his accomplishments during this time period. We can say this much now: Obama has certainly put forth an ambitious agenda and reversed many of the previous administration's directives. No issues have been resolved yet, but we should realize that the problems facing our country will need more time to be overcome.

So, what about the next 100 days? Perhaps the President will want to step back, take a breather, and try to tackle issues much closer to home. Herewith, I humbly submit my suggestions for Barack Obama’s next hundred days in office.

1. Get more photo ops working in the White House vegetable garden. Why should the First Lady get all the glory in this department?

2. Teach Bo not to bark so loud whenever the White House phone rings at 3:00 in the morning.

3. Send another warning to the Secretary of State about her prank phone calls to the White House at 3:00 in the morning.

4. Teach Bo that it is not a good idea to have the military take him on Air Force One for a low ride over Manhattan just so he can inspect the trees in Central Park.

5. Offer an olive branch to the grand, imperial, omniscient, all-wise, deity Rush Limbaugh.

6. Teach Bo not to piddle on Arlen Specter’s shoes. After all, he is a Democrat now.

7. On second thought, disregard suggestion #5. Limbaugh is just an entertainer.

8. Train Bo to understand simple commands like, “Bo! See Dick Cheney? Piddle, Bo, piddle!”

9. Send a coin to the Minnesota Supreme Court so they can use it to decide the Franken/Coleman Senate race.