arteejee

A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Monday, May 09, 2011

The End of the Intermission

Hello, everyone! In case you haven’t noticed, I have not posted any entries in over a week. Did you miss me?

Most likely, you didn’t even notice I was gone, did you? That’s okay, because I know a lot went down since April 26. A birth confirmation, a royal wedding, and an assassination, and each event had major world-wide historical significance.

By the way, just in case you’re wondering why my blog went on intermission last week...well, let’s just say it was combination of factors. I may or may not have had a serious shortage of topic ideas to write about due to my settling into my new job. Or it may have had something to do with my computer being in the shop for over a week. In any event, my computer is back with new and improved memory, my transition back into full time employment is going smoothly, and recent events have given me so many ideas to discuss.

Let’s recap the days of April 28-May 1, 2011; each one will be long remembered throughout the history of mankind for years to come.

APRIL 28 – PRESIDENT BARACK OBAMA PRODUCES THE LONG FORM BIRTH CERTIFICATE TO ONCE AND FOR ALL SILENCE THE CRITICISMS FROM THE BIRTHER CONSPIRACY THEORISTS WHO INSISTED THAT HIS PRESIDENCY WAS ILLEGAL.

On one level, this action had to be hugely embarrassing for Obama. The whole episode reminded me of a child coming home from school and having to face his parents with an unsatisfactory report card. Consider this: Obama was the first man — out of 43 - serving in the White House forced to furnish proof that he was born within the United States border, making him an American citizen who is eligible to hold the office that a majority of Americans elected him to serve in an election two years ago.

Why him? Why not the other 42 men? The only difference I can see between Obama and the other men is — major “duh” moment coming — skin color. There! I said it! I’m not trying to cause trouble, but I’m just saying. Now let’s move on, damn it!

APRIL 29 – PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON MARRY IN LONDON, ADDING MUCH NEEDED VARIETY TO THE ROYAL GENE POOL.

These once in a generation affairs are, of course, a wonderful event to celebrate. It is significant for the happy couple, their families, but also civilization in general. It is happy events like this wedding that could ultimately change the course of future world history. In any event, stay tuned...

APRIL 30 – SATURDAY AND ABSOLUTELY NOTHING HAPPENED!

Okay, I may have been a bit optimistic when I pronounced this four day period as having great historical significance for mankind. Maybe people were recovering from making merry at the Royal Wedding the day before, or maybe it was just a rough work week for mankind in general, but whatever the reason nothing of historical note happened on this day. Maybe we can get a refund or at least partial credit for April 30, because we definitely did not get full value for our history dollar.

MAY 1 - AMERICAN FORCES LOCATE AND KILL AL-QAEDA LEADER OSAMA BIN LADEN.

The news was announced late Sunday night by the president himself, who got the added satisfaction of interrupting Donald Trump’s Celebrity Apprentice to tell the world that Bin Laden was dead. That in itself was a major high-five moment, given the fact that Trump had been riding the president’s butt about his birth certificate for weeks. Obama trumped Trump! Booyah!

Bin Laden’s death was celebrated with questionable taste by many people living in the West. To be fair, people in the free world had built up 10 years of paranoia and terrorist-weary tension. So they took to the streets immediately and carried on like it was New Year’s Eve. Who could blame us infidels, right? I mean besides those in the Arab world who revered Bin Laden.

The spontaneous demonstrations of joy were if nothing else another example of human nature overtaking humanity’s sense of common decency. Of course, we all know that none of us should ever feel so superior over another human being that we can be justified to dance on their graves. We’ve all heard that such an attitude diminishes all of us. We all know that such thinking is un-Christian-like and very, very bad karma.

On the other hand...we are talking about Osama Bin Laden. This is the guy who master-minded the greatest massacre of Americans on American soil in American history. In the years since, he made it quite clear that he didn’t like us, he hated our guts, and — I can’t help noting this — he never sent us a Christmas card! He never wanted to negotiate peace with us; he plotted and advocated for our destruction. Here again, human nature with its attendant idea of self-preservation overruled any hopes we may have had — if ever — to love this enemy as we love ourselves.

It was the negative side of human nature - namely fear, hatred, and intolerance - that is the true enemy of mankind that worked against both sides in this grand drama of global history. That made the cultural gap between us and Bin Laden too wide and too deep for any one generation of mankind to bridge. This realization shouldn’t discourage us from trying harder to bringing all cultures closer together for everyone’s mutual survival and happiness.

Unfortunately, Bin Laden’s ideas were an obstacle that had to be overcome.

Fortunately, his ideas are already losing favor with the new generation of militant Muslims who have risen up against the dictators in the Middle East in what history will henceforth call the Arab Spring. Of course, Bin Laden’s death will almost certainly lead to a new round of retaliatory attacks from another group of militant Muslims - al-Qaeda. At least this time, we’re better prepared than we were on September 11, 2001.

Overall, I have been ambivalent about Bin Laden’s demise. I am relieved of course that he can no longer work to destroy us, but I didn’t feel the need to jump up and down in ecstasy. Truth be told, I was already in bed when Anne Marie told me the news. I just said, “Okay,” turned over, and went back to sleep. In retrospect, I probably should have gotten up and watched the historic announcement on television, but deep down I realized that, in our 24/7 news cycle, I would have ample chance to relive the moment over and over in the days to come.

Thus it happened that the curtain closed on Act One of the War on Terror. Our intermission is now over as well. Time to move on to Act Two with all its attendant intrigues and plot twists that will enthrall and depress us as we move through our daily cycle of rituals which we call our lives. For now, we can mourn or rejoice however we choose that one of our boogeymen won’t harm us anymore.

(As always, thank you for reading. Sorry Janey, we’re fresh out of cucumber sandwiches!)

1 Comments:

Anonymous Janey said...

RTG,

I DID notice that you were not posting, but assumed it was due to the rigors of your new job, which I hope is going well, and about which I hope you'll write.

BTW: Why is it that John McCain, who was born in Panama to American parents, never had "birther" issues, but Obama does? Oh -- that's right, that little skin color issue you mentioned...

Glad you are back! Now get busy with those cucumber sanwiches! :-)

Love,
Janey

May 9, 2011 at 2:58 PM  

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