A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Location: Southeastern, Pennsylvania, United States

Thursday, March 06, 2014

Tila – WTF?

The annual Intelligence Report from the Southern Poverty Law Center has been released, and the good news is that the number of hate groups in the country has dropped a bit. Included in this overall category of social organizations are Ku Klux Klan chapters, neo-Nazi and skinhead groups, anti-LGBT, anti-immigrant, survivalists, birthers, and a variety of conspiracy groups. The bad news is that the violent fervor of the remaining groups seems to be at an all time high.

None of this news surprises me. However, another report in the SPLC's publication raised my eyebrows and nearly caused them to leap off my head. Apparently the Nazi movement has their own pin-up girl now.

Everyone, you remember Tila Tequila?

Yes, this plucky former MTV star must have realized that no one was paying attention to her last year. Late in the year, she responded by posting a rant on her Facebook page saying nice things about Adolf Hitler. She claims that the future Fuhrer was “a special and sweet kid who had a dream to become a painter.”

She also posted a photoshop of her scantily clad self - a swastika armband, a Nazi officer’s cap and little else - brandishing a pistol and standing in front of the entrance to Auschwitz-Birkenau.

WTF, Tila? I would emphasize my reaction by printing it in a font large enough to match my utter shock. Unfortunately, Microsoft Word does not furnish a font size of 18,000.

So let’s look at her argument objectively. Let’s pose, just for the sake of our fictitious argument, that perhaps Hitler was not all that bad…as a child. Even the most hardened historians (who probably owe a good part of their livelihood to Hitler’s existence) may concede that he didn’t slip out of his mother’s womb flashing a Nazi salute. I know I’m casting a big benefit of the doubt towards the most hated monster the world has ever known, but aren’t we all blank canvasses as children? Aren’t our psyches molded and shaped by influences around us as we mature into adults?

In Hitler’s life, there were his disappointments in not being accepted into art school, his growing sense of German nationalism (if he were born in America, we would call this patriotism), and a number of financial setbacks in his youth. So far, it sounds like a typical story of many young people struggling to make their way in the world.

We are all confronted with an assortment of ideas — good, bad and wicked — as we grow up. At some point, we sort out which we want to hold onto and which we want to discard. Many of us base our decisions on what we perceive as the difference between right and wrong.  

Obviously, in young Hitler’s case, he had a very warped perception of right and wrong. He held on to his cherished hatred of the Jewish people and fashioned a political career around it. Even better (for him, but very bad for millions of people), he tapped into a strain of anti-Semitic thinking, fueled by publication of the later debunked Protocols of the Elders of Zion during  his youth; then used it as a springboard to lead his country. Of course, we all know how this story ended: yes, he guided Germany out of the global depression, only to push it over the brink of civilization and into total destruction.

This is what hatred does, and it should be a lesson learned by all aspiring human beings, regardless if they want to be painters or not.

Obviously, this lesson was lost on Tila Tequila. She has lived so many lives in our American culture, as an actress, a star of her own reality show, and now as a serious contender to Yoko Ono’s long held crown as most despised celebrity in America. (Justin Bieber is a verrrry close second!)

Tila, stop worrying about Hitler, and start worrying about Tila.

(Thank you for reading. And thank you Adolf…[font size 18,000] FOR NOTHING!!!!!)


Anonymous Janey said...

Wait -- didn't you and Tila have a fling during our college days? Or am I thinking of another tequila?

Also, be sure to see my second response to your previous post.

March 7, 2014 at 8:51 AM  
Blogger Bob said...

Poor Tila, just a famewhore watching her alleged popularity wane so she has to do something to keep people interested.

And when you have no discernible talent or marketable skills, resort to saying stupid things throughout social media.

Be gone Tila, before someone drops a house on you.

March 7, 2014 at 9:19 AM  
Blogger Amanda said...

I had to Google her since I never heard of her. Really, she is a celebrity? Some people who will do anything to get attention but this is crazy!

March 7, 2014 at 11:10 AM  
Blogger todd gunther said...

Hi Janey, thanks for bringing up our college years. Actually that was a different kind of tequila. Kudos to you for remembering our college years at all, considering all of that smoking you've done over the years. :)

Hi bob, thanks for the comment. Yeah, famewhore! i like that!

Hi Nadege, thanks for the comment. Now, don't you regret googling her?

March 11, 2014 at 8:17 AM  
Blogger Harpers Keeper said...

I must also admit I never heard of Tila before reading this post; which means all I know of her is the Nazi schtick. 'One never get a second chance to make a first impression."

March 17, 2014 at 11:02 PM  

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