SHORT NOTES – MAY 2009
SWINE FLU CASES INCREASE THROUGHOUT AMERICA! PRESIDENT OBAMA URGES COUNTRY TO BE CALM
The good news is that the government has 50 million doses of antibiotic stockpiled to battle this pandemic. The bad news: there are 330 million Americans living in this country. Do the math! Any way you look at it, 280 million of us are screwed. Why is it called swine flu when it is an airborne illness not related to pigs, pork, or pork byproducts, or the handling, cooking, or digesting of pork and pork byproducts? Good question. I believe we call it swine flu because it is easier to say than the cryptic H1N1, which resembles a password for a computer program or an incorrect vanity plate for a motor vehicle licensed in the state of New Hampshire.
At this point in the crisis, it is best to heed the President’s message of caution and optimism. During his news conference last week, he took time to enumerate a number of common sense rules in dealing with this problem. To summarize his points: wash your hands often; stay home if you are sick; cover your mouth when you cough or sneeze; avoid touching your mouth, nose or eyes; avoid traveling in closed spaces like airliners or train cars with Vice President Biden; and avoid giving a 10 year old an AK-47 for his birthday.
All right, those last two points are off subject, but they are important ideas to consider.
SUPREME COURT JUSTICE DAVID SOUTER ANNOUNCES HIS RETIREMENT
The Supreme Court Justice who shocked his conservative supporters with his moderate voting record is stepping down. He announced his retirement despite the fact that he is a youngster (nearly 70) in comparison to the other justices still serving on the bench. Reports state that he does not socialize in Washington and is considered a loner.
Lived there, done that, I feel his pain...
Souter’s retirement should not have come as total surprise. After all, there are signs that it’s time for him to leave. Signs like the Capitol Hill Burger King is refusing to stamp his Supreme Court Whopper Discount card anymore. Also, his colleague, Supreme Court Justice Antonin “Leadfoot” Scalia, hasn’t invited him out for the midnight Saturday drag races on Shirley Highway in ages. He may also be growing tired of being addressed as “young man” by the other justices like he’s some sort of law clerk fresh from passing his bar exam.
Good luck, Justice Souter. Here’s hoping you have a long, happy retirement in New Hampshire!
IT’S CINCO DE MAYO, A BIRTHDAY, AND AN ANNIVERSARY
Today is Cinco de Mayo, a Mexican holiday, which will be treated like St Patrick’s Day and Columbus Day by most people. In other words, another ethnic-centered holiday which is revered by the members of that ethnicity, but treated as an excuse to get sloppy drunk by everyone else. There is something very wrong in degrading the holiday in this way, but unfortunately most participants will be too soused on tequila to care.
It is also my niece’s birthday, and the anniversary when our blog mascot, Steven, came to live with us. It was three years ago today that we brought him home from Kitty Cottage. He has adjusted well and is a very loving companion to his older sister, Meredith. He’ll probably celebrate the occasion with a plate of catnip, but no tequila.
Happy 21st Birthday, Sarah!
The good news is that the government has 50 million doses of antibiotic stockpiled to battle this pandemic. The bad news: there are 330 million Americans living in this country. Do the math! Any way you look at it, 280 million of us are screwed. Why is it called swine flu when it is an airborne illness not related to pigs, pork, or pork byproducts, or the handling, cooking, or digesting of pork and pork byproducts? Good question. I believe we call it swine flu because it is easier to say than the cryptic H1N1, which resembles a password for a computer program or an incorrect vanity plate for a motor vehicle licensed in the state of New Hampshire.
At this point in the crisis, it is best to heed the President’s message of caution and optimism. During his news conference last week, he took time to enumerate a number of common sense rules in dealing with this problem. To summarize his points: wash your hands often; stay home if you are sick; cover your mouth when you cough or sneeze; avoid touching your mouth, nose or eyes; avoid traveling in closed spaces like airliners or train cars with Vice President Biden; and avoid giving a 10 year old an AK-47 for his birthday.
All right, those last two points are off subject, but they are important ideas to consider.
SUPREME COURT JUSTICE DAVID SOUTER ANNOUNCES HIS RETIREMENT
The Supreme Court Justice who shocked his conservative supporters with his moderate voting record is stepping down. He announced his retirement despite the fact that he is a youngster (nearly 70) in comparison to the other justices still serving on the bench. Reports state that he does not socialize in Washington and is considered a loner.
Lived there, done that, I feel his pain...
Souter’s retirement should not have come as total surprise. After all, there are signs that it’s time for him to leave. Signs like the Capitol Hill Burger King is refusing to stamp his Supreme Court Whopper Discount card anymore. Also, his colleague, Supreme Court Justice Antonin “Leadfoot” Scalia, hasn’t invited him out for the midnight Saturday drag races on Shirley Highway in ages. He may also be growing tired of being addressed as “young man” by the other justices like he’s some sort of law clerk fresh from passing his bar exam.
Good luck, Justice Souter. Here’s hoping you have a long, happy retirement in New Hampshire!
IT’S CINCO DE MAYO, A BIRTHDAY, AND AN ANNIVERSARY
Today is Cinco de Mayo, a Mexican holiday, which will be treated like St Patrick’s Day and Columbus Day by most people. In other words, another ethnic-centered holiday which is revered by the members of that ethnicity, but treated as an excuse to get sloppy drunk by everyone else. There is something very wrong in degrading the holiday in this way, but unfortunately most participants will be too soused on tequila to care.
It is also my niece’s birthday, and the anniversary when our blog mascot, Steven, came to live with us. It was three years ago today that we brought him home from Kitty Cottage. He has adjusted well and is a very loving companion to his older sister, Meredith. He’ll probably celebrate the occasion with a plate of catnip, but no tequila.
Happy 21st Birthday, Sarah!
posted by todd gunther | 6:08 AM
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