arteejee

A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Location: Southeastern, Pennsylvania, United States

Sunday, October 08, 2017

The Gun Prayer



Our father, Wayne LaPierre


Who art in National Rifle Association Headquarters in Fairfax, Virginia


Hallowed be thy Second Amendment


Please forgive our transgressions


To dare believe we can change or curb our obsession with guns


To offer our thoughts and prayers to the victims of our violent culture

(But nothing else)


Lead us to shrug our shoulders at every new massacre of innocents


As we chalk up more murders to the cost of living in a free society


And lead us not to pass laws which will take away our weaponry


For we all know that every American gun owner


Is always and forever forthrightly a law-abiding citizen


Who will never lose their mind,


Swear allegiance to our nation’s enemies,


Or just fail to overcome the thrill of killing others 


For personal glory or satisfy their own reckless control issues


And most importantly lead us not to believe anything but YOUR twisted

Interpretation of the Second Amendment


For the right to bear arms enables yourself and the NRA


Access to unlimited material wealth and riches


For thine is the kingdom where common sense does not exist

The power over our Congress


And the glory of the NRA on high.


Amen, and pass the ammunition.



(Thank you for reading.  The preceding is a work of satire and not to be construed as an endorsement of violent acts in public.)

3 Comments:

Blogger Bob Slatten said...

That NRA bastard was on TV this morning and I literally jumped for the remote to mute the sound before changing the channel.

October 8, 2017 at 2:04 PM  
Blogger Ur-spo said...

ouch

October 8, 2017 at 6:02 PM  
Blogger todd gunther said...

That sounds like a close call indeed, Bob!

I like to think the best satire comes with a sting. Thank you, Spo.

October 8, 2017 at 7:03 PM  

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