arteejee

A site of satirical musings, commentary and/or rhetorical criticism of the world at large.

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Location: Southeastern, Pennsylvania, United States

Sunday, June 07, 2015

The Monday Morning Blessing



Where: Chez Gunther

When: any and every Monday morning

Warrior Queen arises; sunlight seeps through the curtains and crashes into her eyes.

WQ:  Damn!   It’s Monday!   I hate Mondays!*

A sphere of bright light appears in the room.  A fairy godmother-like creature (think Good Witch Glinda from The Wizard of Oz) steps out of the light which fades and disappears.

Monday Morning Fairy: Oh, Anne Marie, you mustn’t hate this day with such venom. It’s a new day with new opportunities to do good things for all of mankind!

WQ: Eff Mondays!

MMF: Oh dear! Do you kiss your husband with that potty mouth?

WQ: Mondays suck!

MMF: Now, now! We must allow the day to go forward and present itself with all its glorious promise.

WQ: Where’s my Grumpy Cat shirt?

MMF: Oh Anne Marie, maybe Monday should promise to chew you up and spit you out!

WQ: Everything about today sucks! Sucks, sucks, sucks.

MMF: You know, I could arrange for Judy Garland’s house to fall on you!

WQ: You suck!

MMF: No, you suck!

WQ: No, you suck!

MMF: No, you…

Ad nauseum.

*Warrior Queen’s dialogue is derived from actual quotes she has been known to utter at Chez Gunther on any given Monday.

(Thank you for reading. Next time: Warrior Queen and Monday Morning Fairy wrestle in a vat of jello!)